So this post is basically me chiming in on Sunny's previous post (which is all dead on about our recent nights out) but at times, I was not with Sunny so I need to put it out there what else goes on when we hit Boston.
Let me start with our nite @ Ned Devines a few weekends ago and state that me, sunny and the other girls all looked really hot, which is probably why I was successful in my quest to the UN of the dating world by chatting up 1 German and 2 Aussies. What can I say, American men just do not do it for me. I've tasted the international waters and it was very a quinching thurst that only foreign boys can help me out with. One big thing that Sunny forgot was the fact that there was a Snuggy bar crawl taking place in Fanueil Hall that evening (I know, I wish someone totally gave me the memo also *please note the sarcasm*). So we walk upstairs when we first arrive and I see a very large man in a Purdue snuggy with a rubber ducky necklace. Like really buddy, nice way to cockblock yourself. Why? Because I dispise them. Yes, he had a good convo starter, even I talked to him, but the whole convo was me telling him he should have saved his money and bough a bathrobe and wore it backwards. The only cheap thrills in that convo was when he let me squeeze his rubber ducky. Later in the nite, me and the Asian Persusian go to the middle bar since I need a drink and I just cant do bud or budlight, when we come across a very adorable gay man. Now, as much as I loved chatting to this man, I had really set up a good convo starter with 2 men who also had accents! If memory serves me correctly, they were English. Now, I only got to talk to them for a min because our gay friend was hugging us a lot and these 2 English guys thought I was with our new huggy friend. NO!!!!! The universe is trying to cockblock me! Me and the Asian Persusian move back to the backroom to dance and watch the band, where I proceed to get half a beer spilt on 1 boob. Yea, really attractive, I know! We are dancing the nite away when I see Sunny holding her heels in her hands! Apparently some DB tried to fight her (the DB was a guy) so she took them off to battle. It was kind of like watching Bruce Lee. You never knew what kind of jab she'd want to throw! After all has settled, we go back to dancing. The nite ends so we go outside. Now, no matter how many times we tell ourselves we won't buy a sausage at 2am, what do we do? Buy a sausage at 2am. So I'm taking my time putting ketchup on when I decide to ask a random man on a bench if he likes sausages. This man has a very German accent and did not get my pervert joke whatso ever, even though he did complimentary boob grabs to Sunny earlier, which I did not find out about until later! So after I get yelled at for talking to the German Groper, we go to the main road to get a taxi, where I let all the girls find one while I chat up 2 very tall Aussies who noticed I had no coat and it was freezing. They didnt care for sausages. I asked.
Zumba and the crack lady- The white tank lady was beyond being a hot mess. Our Zumba teacher works at a bar/restaurant across the street from my work so I went in to visit her the following day and she was in shock at how bad of a dancer this white tank lady was and our teacher is convinced she was drunk or on something because she not only did the oppositie of what the whole class did, but she was constantly like 5 beats behind everyone. It was basically the only guarenteed thing about this lady cause those ballet flats were sooo wrong on soooo many levels. We all wear sneakers and work out clothes. She rolled out of bed and stole her daughters ballet shoes apparently...for a 7pm Zumba class. AT the end of class, white tank lady goes & tells our teacher, in a very drunk voice, that is she packing for Vegas and won't be in class for a week. Now, I hope she went to Vegas, got drunk, and went swimming in the water show outside the belagio and got arrested and is stuck in a jail like the one in Hangover, where field trips come by and the kids laugh at you. Thankfully she has not returned, but her friend still does. Now her friend is normal and can dance and is also 40, but did a huge TMI at the next class by telling us that her and her hubby just got a hot-tub and like to go out there at 2.30am. Seriously, I dont even know if I would tell my friends about my 2.30am sexcapades everyday, so why would you tell a bunch of strangers? Veryyyy weird!
And our nite at the Estate was a bad scene out of gossip girl. Like I could handle partying with Blair or Serena, but the female Chuck Bass? I think not! Before I went out, I was in bed. I would have been fine rolling out, getting dressed/ looking cute and hitting a bar, but these places are clubs, so it takes more effort. not to mention the place was so crammed, I got many curtosy grabs by men who had no intentions of ever touch my twins, which looked huge thanks to a ny & co belt I borrowed from Sunny. Seriously, I dont know how they got so big. But anyway, we leave and are almost not let into a club because Asian Persiaan is laughin at a joke a guy said. Now, as much as I love to flirt, no man is worth not getting into a club for and doing the walk of shame away from the front door...especially one that is beyond being called a trash bar. The guys in this club were all either stinky, creepy, a combo or both, or clearly have never been laid and felt this bar was where they would meet the woman to change it all (& by the looks of the ladies, he'd probably get a few STD's, which might be the least of his problems since there was obv a roofie epidemic going on somewhere in the city that nite).
Leaving Gyspy, the birthday girl decides to take her shoes off, which resulted in me and sunny telling her that if she does that, she must accept a piggy back ride from one us. Between Sunny's gym sessions with crazy Fiona and me just quitting the supermarket industry where my boss forgot I was the only girl on his staff so gave me the same big boxes meant for men, we are both pretty strong girls. This didnt work. Sunny said she would get hypatitis. This didnt work. I stated that homeless people live in the common and there is glass and needles. This didnt work. So I eventually gave up in that fight. Thankfully we only walked through the public gardens, with no homeless to be seen. Apparently its a little too fancy for them so they stay across Charles st and only sleep in the Commons.
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